.....

I always wish for so many things but i wonder am i gonna get all those? Am i gonna work hard to reach my goals? Wishing is indeed easy but when you had to go through the process of working hard for it, it sucks and sometimes for me, i tend to just give up halfway. I have a whole list of things that i want to get, i still want to accomplish those resolutions i have made at the start of the year.

But the start of the year is indeed quite bad to start off already. We both fought and fought and fought and i wonder how the hell will things resolve in this case. I know i am not patient enough when it comes to tolerating your anger to wards me. Honestly, i hate people trying to scold me, fuck me upside down, scream at me at all. And usually, i know my part of being at fault since after those incidents, i came to realized that i should and i really should have enough patience and tolerance towards you. As a boyfriend, yes i agree that i should tolerate when you're mad at me or anything like that. Its just that these tolerance and patience do have limits as well. I mean it sucks getting stuck in these situation. Its like i know i should not fight back with you, but i did it anyway. I don't know. Its like you can't help it like that. And really, that sucks.

I do want to correct my mistakes for the past few years we have been together and sometimes if you feel that i'm not loving you enough, i'm sorry i don't mean to make you feel that way. To be honest, i have always love you despite what has always happen. No matter how annoying i find you at times or irritating at times, i still love you and i know its just a matter of time you will be all right after that. Sorry to have hurt you at the start of the year. At the start of something where you and i are looking forward for this year. I love you baby...

And so here i am in class stuck in programming lesson wishing i do not have to do all these. I was thinking about it... and i guess that the only thing that i can score well is communication. And thats it. Since all the other modules i really have to survive on my daily grades instead of my UTs. I hate this. I wish i can take up another course which i fancy and i'm sure i can do well for that. But what i have already taken, i'm just gonna go for it. Where it will take me, i shall see if it really benefits me.